When we were kids, we didn't need licenses for any of this stuff

I am certified.

My blood has been tested & my skin has been examined.

My ears have been inspected & my tonsils have been scrutinized.

My fingerpads have been scanned, copied, and verified.  

My driving record has been retrieved, reviewed, and approved.

My First-Aid card has been validated (for the next one thousand days).

I will keep your information confidential.

I will not sexually harass you, (so you'd better not harass me).

NOW, I am certified.

Count me not cynical toward the system, but simply weary of jumping through all these hoops.  For so it has seemed. 

NOW (but only NOW!?) I am certified to hear your story, to walk with you, & to laugh with you. 

I'll see you soon, whoever you are.